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12 December 2005 @ 12:07 am
MTCFF Ultra Episode 6 - The Incredibly Long Episode!  
It's Midnight. It's dark, it's cold, and there's a lot of helluva tough people out there in the world. Do you know where YOUR children are? That's right, they're reading Magical Troubleshooting Crossover Fighting Federation Ultra: The Summary!


Chapter Six of Ultra was written by Aaron Peori(aka Epsilon, no LJ known) (side note: I'm really behind on emailing authors. Gotta do that.)

If ominous music playing could be playing in the background as we trek into the start of the chapter, it would, as Orochi has a discussion with a mysterious individual who considers the Orochi an inferior, if impressive, being of evil! Who could this magnificent master of malice be? Maybe we'll find out later. As they part ways, with an ominous deal sort of in place... we fade to China... and find someone willing to sneer in the face of God! (pleasant opening, this) And more startling, Kasumi has a favor to ask!

And we're off into the opening maelstrom of announce-dom! We get our first rumbling of a mysterious event called "UltraRage", while Kasumi reveals to Nabiki that the favor she asked for previously was that of guest commentary! And soon we're introduced to our third announcer of the evening Tarou (Ranma 1/2)!! As Daisuke almost spills the beans on Tarou's full name, he finds himself on the receiving end of a love tap by Tarou, a fierce fighter in his own right. As Daisuke bleeds quietly into the announcer's table, the match begins!

Gambit and Iori exchange 'pleasantries', and Iori is wise enough to remember Ken's mistake a few episodes back and ignore Gambit's outstretched hand. As the match began in earnest, it seemed as if we might be doomed to a fireball fight, as they exchange riot of the blood and kinetically charged cards between each other. However, as the match got more intense, Iori actually managed to snap Gambit's staff in twain, leaving the Cajun at a bit of a disadvantage. Pressing his tactical advantage, Iori trapped Gambit in the corner and laid into him with a flurry of attacks. Just when all was thought to be lost, Gambit managed to flip over Iori and smash him into a kinetically charged corner post. While damaging the ring with an explosion, it was effective in downing Iori, if only temporarily. Gambit too, seemed worse for the wear as the fight continued, and Iori's sheer tenacity got him the win... and the not so important "Biggest Badass in Ultra" title.

Backstage we're re-introduced to Yotsuya (sigh), and he quickly butts in and tries to interview a departing Iori. However, before Iori can lay into the annoying micstand, Yashiro shows up with Shermie, and the two argue. Before any violence can be had, the Orochi appears and declares that Iori is his harbinger, and thus not to be harmed. The discussion breaks up, as Shermie hints that the pair might be joining Ultra in an official capacity as Lambda fighters in the near future.

Motrin commercial using the Gambit/Iori fight!

The announcers introduce our next match, a long running grudge match between Lina Inverse and Naga the Black Serpent! We find Lina on yet ANOTHER sand covered planet, to which she is less than pleased, and with traveling companion Gourry! In the course of their conversation, they discover that Lina's magic doesn't work in this strange environ! As Naga appears and Touga announces, the match begins! And inexplicably, while Naga pulls a rather fine Dan and taunts her opponent to death, Lina launches into a Dragon Slave! Doesn't her magic not work here??

And we're introduced to two... uh, sombodies. Bart and Rico (Xenogears) are flying their gears towards the scene of the battle! Meanwhile, Lina's Dragon Slave knocks out Naga immediately.

So much for the power of [Hate]. And, uh, Lina's magic not working there?

Energizer Pikachu commercial!

Yotsuya interviews Lina, who fails to explain how her Magic Switch went from Off to On in the battle. And then Bart and Rico grab her! After a bit of chest grabbing, Lina fireballs the entire interview platform into ashes, sending our two errant guests skyward and out of sight.

Next, we're backstage as Dan prepares for his match! The mighty Dan! The Stone Cold Dan! The absolutely screwed Dan as the mysterious figure from the start of the episode punks him! Ah, well. Mysterious beam has hit Dan, what will it do to our favorite Saikyo master?

Johnny Cage enters the ring, but not before plaugerizing Bret the Hitman Hart's entrance poses. He was met by a TRANSFORMED Dan... Dan of the Arousal of Unpleasant Intent... Shin Dan! As this new, Evil! Dan stages his taunts, the announcers wondered what this would do for the formerly power-challenged fighter! They got their answer as Dan and Johnny leap into it. Dan's Gadouken is adequate in blocking Johnny's fireball, and they launch into fisticuffs! As the fight escalates, Johnny unveils his most powerful technique, the NUT CRACKER (I named it myself). Dan is pained, but launches into a super uppercut just as Johnny launches an aerial assault, resulting in a BALL BUSTING KORYUUKEN (I really have to stop naming the attacks). Both fighters stand after a moment of silence, Dan having taken a blow to the head in the mayhem. Dan launches a dazzling finishing move... the SHINKUU GADOUKEN... and nearly finishes himself as the super charged ball of ki energy exploded in front of him after dropping to the mat.

But Dan isn't done! As Johnny winces from the pain of laughing at Dan's shortcomings, Dan launches into an incredibly long named attack that breaks nearly every bone in his body! Despite the self injury, he manages to belly flop onto Johnny's already injured form, knocking the Mortal Kombatant out cold. Dan is a winner!

As the stage hands sweep the two fighters backstage for medical treatment, Sephiroth gives Yotsuya the pleasure of an interview! As Yotsuya makes inquires to Sephiroth about his motives in being in Ultra, the Bishounen waxes philosophical in response. Kaworu seemed a bit unnerved and attempted to out cryptic Sephiroth in a duel of words!

Next up is a match between those who had hands and would use them, and those who had breasts and would try not to let them be grabbed! Team Hentai versus Team Aensland for the Lambda title. However, Tarou seems somewhat unnerved by the involvement of Happosai, who apparently had once been Tarou's master, and also threatens to reveal Tarou's full name.

As the match begins, it appears as if Team Hentai has a heavy advantage. Tarou and Ataru explain that Happosai has the ability to become stronger by absorbing the power off of beautiful women's auras, and they don't come much more packed in the looks department than Morrigan and Lilith. Lilith finally tags out, only to have Happosai tag Ataru in at the same time.

But what's this? Happosai and Ataru both stay in the ring and go for the team up! The Feared DOUBLE GLOMP. Morrigan shakes off the perverts, and extends a hand to Lilith. The two succubi fuse into one being... Liligan (any relation to Gilligan?) and finish Ataru with a giant Soul Eraser that also destroys the ring! Kasumi decides that as the legal man in the ring Ataru has lost the match for the two morally questionable fighters.

And then we have our first look at UltraRage Alpha: Rumble at the Pearly Gates! It looks like a real slobberknocker of an event! (/J.R.)

We're then back, and our ring has been replaced (quick stage techs)!

We're introduced to our fighters, Felicia versus Ken Masters! Ken launches into a flurry of attacks... apparently not aimed in any particular direction. Felicia counter attacks, which seems to jar Ken into the fight. Ken then replies with a series of rapid attacks that send Felicia flying back into the corner! Tarou declares the match decided, as Ken tries to solicit a surrender from the cat-girl. Felicia perseveres, and fights on! But not for long, as Ken launches into a fierce hurricane kick super that ends the match!

Backstage, Ken arrives post-match and begins a very bizarre, non-related to Ultra interview with Yotsuya that does nothing but stall for the entrance of Shingo and Ranma. Ranma is lecturing Shingo about some of his moves, when Ken steps up to challenge Ranma for next week's show... if Ranma doesn't lose to Sakura this week, that is.

Before Ranma can fully form his retort, a sudden crashing nose erupts, interrupting him. Bart and Rico come crashing through the ceiling, landing on poor Ranma's melon not once, but twice. An argument erupts as Bart and Rico defend their haphazard return to earth as Lina's previous fireball had knocked them quasi-orbital. Rico's anger at the situation overwhelms him, however, and he tears into his 'friend' Bart.

And that's when God shows up. Shingo volunteers to fight in Ranma's stead to defend his honor, while Kasumi approaches Rico and Bart to discuss current events!

And then we're ringside, as we're introduced to the first Shingo/Sakura meeting! Already checking her out as early as episode six, Shingo is impressed by his opponents... stance. Yes, her stance. Shingo attempts a fierce attack as he copies Ranma's style for this match. His lightning fists are slightly sub par, however, and Sakura easily dodges and counters. Sakura presses the attack and keeps up with her aggressive stance, as Shingo darts about, dodging and leading Sakura into some sort of trap. Then it's revealed, Shingo is using one of Rama's ultimate techniques! However, he seems to get the basics of it mixed up, and ends up KO'ing himself with Ranma's hurricane uppercut finisher!

And for our final Lambda fight of the evening, we have a bit of a bait and switch! Wolverine and Shadowcat have accepted the general challenge issued out to the newest fighters of the Lambda division! Yashiro and Shermie appear at the top of the ramp, but appear to be... uh... finding their seats? Rico and Bart are our new competitors!

Bart starts us out, showing his prowess of the whip as he promptly sends his whip at Kitty Pryde! She's unaffected, obviously, having phased out in time to dodge the blow, but hey, A for Effort! The match continues as thus, with Bart on the losing end of things, until he realizes that Shadowcat can't be intangible when she strikes him! One defensive ki attack later, and Shadowcat is blasted back into the ropes! Tagging out, Wolverine then smashes Bart into his corner, where the large and in charge Rico takes possession of the match from his partner!

And then... they act like a couple of old hens and compare 'poor me stories'.

For the rest of the match.

Dazzling entrance by new fighters, I tell you.

It's the return of Yotsuya! The man is an unstoppable, ColdFury torturing BEAST, I tell you! He's interviewing Orochi, quizzing him as to the Orochi's reasons for entering Ultra.

... Kasumi asked him. And he agreed, so long as he could kill people. Wha -? Kasumi agreed to let him.. wha? *sighs* And why would he need to join a tournament to kill people... couldn't he just go stomp Tokyo? Or did Godzilla have it booked full this year? *mutter*

ANYWAY, we're back to real time, and start our Omega match as Sephiroth and Orochi go at it in some unidentifiable (to me) Omega setting! Sephiroth and Orochi clash in a battle of mystic proportions... as our announcers tangle with the local... uh... clones? The mysterious 'Computer' running things in this locale reveals Tarou's accursed name... Pantyhose Tarou! In response Tarou reveals his very own Nerima curse, and turns into a giant flying minotaur thing! He then proceeds to trash the city!

Meanwhile, the actual fight is occurring, as Orochi and Sephiroth have proven themselves equal badasses. They attack each other at the same instance, but Sephiroth has something that Orochi doesn't... Defensive magic! (Doesn't Shield block physical attacks? Shouldn't Shell be the appropriate spell here?)

Sephiroth impales the God of [Hate] on the Masamune, and blasts him with magical energy! He discards the fallen God, and issues a warning to the Omega champ, Shinji Ikari! Sephiroth means business!

And then we're back to our controversial mysterious figure, who is unleashing a mysterious creature! The foul creature tries to destroy the figure (confusing, ain't it) and then the two laugh maniacally together!

And we're done!

Recap Flashback!

][ IORI YAGAMI declared BIGGEST BAD@$$ in Gamma.
][ OMEGA MATCH 1: LINA INVERSE defeats NAGA, now 2W/1L
][ GAMMA MATCH 4: SAKURA defeats SHINGO, now 3W/OL